Sometime, it's better to left unspoken.

Okay, It's been awhile I've actually blogged. Recently my mind been thinking alot, really alot. is like there's so many people around me that I couldn't tell who is real and who is not. 

That actually explain my absent from blogging. And those bill at home really stressing me up. I went to MSF for some financially help. And hope it will be approve.

I am lazy to type today. So good-bye for now. Both miniB & giantB is going for zoo trip tomorrow. Shall update again.

my house, new 小B & 大B!

Sometime, I just doesn't know how to express myself. I'm sorry.

I'm not okay.

It's been almost a week I came here to update. It was a busy weekend last week. As I will usually go over to my mom's place on Sunday, but because Saturday was Vesak Day, which make Saturday a public holiday. And I was pretty bored at home so decided to bring both miniB & giantB over to stay at mom's place together.

Have our usual weekend affair, which is Mahjong! It's a every Sunday thing, will always meet up with grandma after her church and play Mahjong till late night, perhaps 9PM which I will be getting ready to go home. Last weekend was much more fun, as my sis turn-ed up at my mom place too.

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And as usual she kidnapped my miniB home. miniB love my sister alot, whenever she see her she will get so excited and will always wanna go home with her. So it's not surprise that she actually went home with my sis since Sunday. But I can tell she is enjoying her life there. Guess she will only be back this weekend.

I've brought a new box of Kinetic Sand for both miniB & giantB. As one float for them to share it's abit too difficult, so happen to see it on qoo10 with a reasonable price so decided to buy another set. So eventually, 3KG of kinetic sand, 10 mini mold, and some tools, a float & a box costed me only SGD20. So it's really a good buy. item received nicely packed, and fully bubble wrapped. I have removed the bubble wrap, cause there's my address on it. 

Been busy packing parcel and mailing. Been giving out alot of things over the past few day. But of cause they have to pay me my polymail, postage and bubble-wrap. So below is quarter of the parcel that is yet to mail.

Back to that crazy bitch who started texting me yesterday, like one mad dog. So she and AndersC have an argument, over a very stupid issue. AndersC ask her not to keep texting me, and not to get herself involves in our marriage issue, she got agitated and assume that AndersC still love me. Like seriously, asking you to not get involves is because it doesn't concern you. And it definitely not nice for a mistress to keep texting the wife isn't it? dude, common sense here.

tadah~ that's how crazy it seem asking me to take him back, really? But of cause I wouldn't want him back. Why would I take him back now? If I want to I would have took back long ago. So ya, this bitch is making my life so entertained with her drama.

Anyway, finally tomorrow is Friday. I will be having a day break, I will be going for night's out! Yes, anyway I'm not going to drink at pub, or neither am I heading to Club. S's mom birthday, and I'm invited to have dinner with her. Still thinking what should I buy for her birthday. A bottle of red wine? Guess shall decide tomorrow. That's all for now.

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I've nothing much to post. that's about it for the past few day. I guess that's about all. Ending my post with my two princess. 

Goodbye, till we meet again.

Just keep on moving.

I actually have nothing interesting to post today. I was home the whole day as the weather was so good that I am so lazy to do anything. Can you imagine is just wind & rain for almost the whole day since I woke up. For once I don't that I need to shower for 3, to 4 time a day. 

So the only I do today while miniB & giantB is in childcare was playing with my nano-block. Been playing it for awhile. Trying to complete all 24 boxes, but after doing two boxes today I feel tired. So decided to stop. So I am left with only five boxes now. So the two I did today... (photo below)

After doing this, I decided to take a afternoon nap, but that afternoon nap, lasted me till evening, and it was time to fetch both miniB & giantB home. As usual after dinner, shower them and they have their own play time. Today they decided to play with their newly brought Kinetic Sand, something cool to play with. Cause I personally doesn't like playdough, so they wouldn't have a chance to own a playdough of their own. Since I was a kid, I hated playdough alot, due to the smell, it make me wanna vomit. So I is like a childhood phobia to me. But thanks to this new Kinetic Sand they changed their dream.

This sand look like playdough, but it isn't playdough. "Kinetic Sand is a three-dimensional building toy made of 98% sand and 2% polydimethylsiloxane (a type of silicone oil) that mimics the physical properties of wet sand. Kinetic Sand was originally designed for sculpting but is commonly sold as indoor play sand for children. In appearance it resembles light brown sugar. It can be molded, it sticks to itself but not to most other materials or surfaces, and it does not dry out." - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kinetic_Sand 

Hope the link above can be a guide for you what is this Kinetic Sand about. Anyway there's alot of name for this. The one I brought was named as Modern Sand. 

 So that's how it look like. It can be shaped to the design. And you can see they actually like it alot. I shall not post much for today. Feeling tired already, Goodnight people.

The next chapter.

Rain rain go away, come again another day. It's been raining badly in the afternoon this few day. Today I have a parcel needed to be sent by registered mail, as a promise to my customer I will get it sent by today, so decided to go over to singpost, and just went I was about to leave, there it comes a heavy down pour. But since I taking public transport I didn't bother to went back home to get an umbrella. Bus-ed over to singpost before meeting my cutie Minyi, and clever girl like me, of cause I got drenched totally. 

After dropping my mail, slowly walk over to Sun Plaza under the big rain, and by then I am all wet when I reached Sun Plaza. Went down to POSB to withdraw some cash, cause I definitely need it later or so, headed up to Sushi Express located at level 2 to wait for her. Sushi Express doesn't allow people to enter first unless everyone have reach, so that explain why I didn't go in first. *She was late as usual. Forever late. Have a long chat today with her as usual, we always seem to have alot to catch up but never have time to finish all our story. But at least I know I have someone like her with me around. There's no need a daily message, a daily call or anything, but I know when I needed someone to talk to she will be around. 

After meal. I headed to library to borrow some book for both miniB & giantB to kill their boredom at home. As usual miniB will have those flap book and slide out book, as well as texture book. She love all those books it will at least catch her attention, while giantB she wanted fairy-tales story book. (But you know fairy-tales don't exist right?)  So gotten a total of 8 book today, as it was last minute plan, didn't carry extra bag to store more book, so just 8 book will do. Now both of them are soundly asleep, while I am staring at this computer trying to understand my life as much as I wish I have a fast forward button to see what will life be.

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I am wondering what will my life be 5 years later. Is sad to live a life not knowing what will happen tomorrow. Especially a life like mine, you wouldn't want to be me. Trying to struggle everyday, trying so hard to be the best mom for the kids. Is so tired trying everyday. Sometime I just wish I could just shut myself down without having to think about my life. But you know certain thing in life, it cant be changed, now nor later. 

So I am having an big argument with AndersC, current girlfriend. She can't wait to get a long term pass visit, so she definitely need to me to get divorce with AndersC as soon as possible. So AndersC doesn't need to fly to BKK every month just to be with her. And she have the mindset of thinking I want him back, which I don't understand where that ideal come from. But definitely is a big NO isn't it? I've moved on happily since 2 years ago, why would I want someone I leave long ago back? So she go texting me, spamming me for 2 day straight about divorce issue. And it pissed me off when he bring in AndersC family in. 

This is my marriage issue, I believe it doesn't concern her much or maybe it do concern her. But at least not coming to me and question me like as if I am the mistress now. She also doesn't need to be proud about AndersC family accepting her. So below is the message conversation she have with me, just part of it. Too many pages, but I guess three photo is more than enough to see how crazy his girlfriends is acting.

Basically she texted me "Next month pls appointment for open file first." (Next month please book appointment to open file first). Which I find it super rude, because the way she talk was straight in to the topic, And then "16-23 u choose one which day u free". Woah, so she is already putting a date for me to sign the divorce letter, instead of AndersC come and tell me personally she come and tell me. How big is she as a girlfriends? Then next was "I also talk with his dad alr about this" (I also talked to his dad about this issue already.) So she is trying to show me how close is she with his family isn't it? This part really got me pissed off. Is my marriage issue, she get herself involve and then now get his family into our problem. How am I suppose to be calm and not got worked out?

I understand she is having a long distance relationship with AndersC, but seriously does it matter to me? So I simply just tell her, I can don't sign the divorce letter, even after he file. And there she go crazy thinking I still want him back that's why I don't want to sign, but she doesn't see the problem actually lies on her for getting involves and making matter worst. For god sake why would I want to stick with him. Anyway this drama is coming to an end, hopefully by end of June.

I am going to get the divorce done, and make myself a free women. I am tired of being tied down by the word marriage, whereby I couldn't live my life the way I want it. Both miniB & giantB will definitely in my full custody it's impossible I am giving miniB to him. I also requested to change miniB surname and of cause removing his father name under her birth certificate, but sad to say AndersC disagree to this. Most of term he agree except for changing miniB surname, which I understand why he didn't agree to it. So let's hope time fly fast, so I can set myself free from all this shitty drama. 

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Alright, I am ending this post here. Goodnight people. xoxo!

Decided to come back blogging. I suppose there's no reader in my blog. But at least a place for me to read what have been going on in my life? I love typing anyway.

So last dated blog was 2015, September. Shall not brush much about what's going on during those period. I suppose is the worst end year I ever had in 2015. Cause I left my job during that period, It was a big struggle to me, because I've no income at all. Not to mention a single bit of saving. And if you're wondering whether I'm working now, the answer is NO! I just got fire from my last job, not because of my bad performance, but I guess that day itself, Doctor Wong having PMS. I was having a very high fever that day, so I decided to took MC, and they have shortage of staff in the clinic that day, and well he vent the anger on me, and I am FIRED. Eventually, I am doing nothing now, of cause I am finding job. Heading for interview on coming Monday, all the best to me.

miniB just recover from her fever, two week ago. Same goes to giantB. Thank god is not HFMD (hand foot mouth disease) this year HFMD was rather strong, as per news, there's alot of HFMD cases the past few week due to Singapore weather. So to those mummy out there, please let your baby, toddlers, children to drink lots of water to avoid them for falling sick. 

Anyway, I've snapped my hair, and now I actually miss my long hair. But never mind, hair will grow isn't it? I didn't know my hair was that long till I actually snapped it. 

giantB is going to be in primary one next year, I am getting worried as day by day pass, due to me not having a stable job now, is almost the same as not having a stable income. Bills at home now is stacking up, one after another, I am thankful that I've settle all the outstanding bill last month. So tally up all my bill, it could actually round up close to 500SGD. Why isn't GST money coming in this month so I wouldn't be having so much worries on my shoulder.

Going to have sushi date tomorrow with MinYi after like 3 week of not seeing her? How about the rest of the people I use to hang out with, all gone. Don't ask me what happen, cause neither do I know. But doesn't matter, this is life, people come and go eventually. 

So I been chatting with my friends wife, and eventually we became friends too. But it's sad to see their marriage falling apart. Trying to be a listening ear to her as much as she need me, I try to be there for her, even though I also fall asleep when noon come. But she is definitely a nice girl to be around with, I remember when I was badly sick last week, and no one is with me, she actually called delivery for me, knowing I have gone the whole day without food. Very thoughtful lady right? I am actually touched. Usually this kind of thing suppose to be all my suitor doing isn't it? But it came from a girl, I barely know well. But anyway we click off well. Maybe cause she is going through some shit that's similar to me?  I prayed that things goes well for her one way or another. 

I shall stop being chatty. And end my long nagging post here, time to tuck both miniB & giantB to bed now. Goodbye for now.

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